Excuses

It has been nearly four months since I have written.

I have a list of excuses:

My computer broke. (It really did.)

I have been watching infomercials online searching for the perfect weight loss scheme.

I have purchased said weight loss schemes, realized they were crap, and wasted time emailing computerized customer service reps to get my money back.

I have wholly devoted myself to meal planning for my family. This pursuit has including reading many blogs written by awesome women who I’m sure don’t have it all together, but appear that they do. They can make a mountain of freezer meals in a three hour nap time and have the photos to “prove” it.

I have been cutting letters out of sand paper and gluing them to cardboard, printing pre-writing worksheets, and plastering giant calendars with moveable dates all over my walls!

I have been trying to shut off my computer and lay down to sleep at 10 pm so that I don’t yell at my beautiful children and loathe my amazing husband the next day.

I have been escaping my home in the evenings when the girls are in bed to shop at Banana Republic and eat chocolate mousse at Whole Foods.

I have been cursing the heat and basking in a wide array discontents.

I have been calling 911 when my 14 month old has seizures instigated by dropping a toy drum on her toes, getting her fingers pinched in a drawer, or stepping on a burr that somehow got onto the rug. She cannot cope with the pain it causes her to hold her breath and sends her into seizures. (Praise God she is unharmed by them!)

I have been trying to control EVERY LITTLE DETAIL to try to avoid these events.

I have been exhausted.

I have been in denial.

I have been looking for large freezers on Craig’s List to hold all those ridiculous freezer meals!

I have forgotten my own voice…… and thus have been helpless to write anything true.

But I hear it calling now. It’s still a bit distant and a bit loopy, but it says:

“Screw the freezer meals!”

“Run your ass off (sorry if this offends anyone, but if you only knew the self control I have used on this post=))!”

“Keep up your diligent efforts to organize your days and resources to bless your family.”

” Keep going to sleep at 10, 9 would be better. Embrace your mornings and love you life again!”

“Stop striving.”

“Sit down.”

“Trust people.”

“Trust God with that little seizing angel, after all He created her and His purposes for her life and your life are perfect.”

“Stop procrastinating and plan the flipping date night with your husband- you might actually enjoy it.”

So there’s my honesty in all its glory.

You’re welcome.

And THANK YOU!

For your prayers, your friendship, for reading………

Please keep reading. I’ll be posting weekly from here on out and if you haven’t joined my RSS feed please do! You can get my new posts directly to your inbox and comment on them from there. Super easy=).